Good or Bad
by TDCSI
Summary: Ok, I decided this needed more. So I wrote more, original huh? Spoilers for 7X23 & 7X24 for you poor people who haven't seen them yet. I feel for you, really I do.
1. Chapter 1

This insane story came from God knows where, oh yeah, my head. But it was brought on by three dorks IMing during last nights episode. Yeah, me, thegreatbluespoon, and Kakidoll, quite the combination huh? Kaki did the beta work for me, and in record time I must add. I hope the ending is enough, cause like I said on the phone, my brain is fried.

* * *

Good or Bad

Grissom stood on the porch watching Heather welcome the granddaughter she had never met. A smile over took his face, he did good. Well, partially. Now he had to deal with Sara. He silently walked back to his Denali, only to see one that mirrored his pull away from up the block.

"Sara." She had followed him.

Grissom quickly jumped into his and followed her. He picked up his cell and feverishly dialed her number. The first time it rang several times. He could see her through the rear window as she answered and hung up right away.

"Dammit, Sara. Answer."

He tried again, only this time it went straight to her voice mail, indicating she had shut it off.

"Fuck!"

Grissom threw his phone and watched it bounce off of the windshield before falling to the floorboard. As he followed her, he realized she was going back to the lab. Smart, be in public to avoid confrontation. When he tried to explain things before, she refused to listen, and he heard her voice catch. She was jealous of Heather and it showed. Although he couldn't understand why, he and Heather were just friends. She was the only friend he had outside of work. He trusted her as much as she trusted him.

Sara pulled up and wildly parked in front of the lab. Grissom didn't bother finding a spot as he pulled up behind her and jumped out.

"Sara!"

She threw her hand in the air as she stalked away. Grissom ignored that and ran up behind her. He grabbed her raised arm and spun her around.

"Sara."

Her face was red streaked by the many tears she had shed. Grissom quickly looked around to see who might be watching before escorting her back to his truck. He helped her into the passenger seat before moving around to get in himself. Sara remained silent as she stared out of the passenger window, not daring to make eye contact with him.

Grissom drove to their home. He paused, not getting out, and Sara never moved either.

"Sara, let me explain."

"I told you it's fine."

"Obviously it's not fine. You're upset. That's not fine in my book." He sighed and turned to face her with his body. "Sara, Heather is a good friend."

Sara scoffed.

"What?"

She turned to look at him for the first time. "According to Catherine, you have some sort of weird relationship with her. So, who does wear the chaps?"

Grissom looked at her wide-eyed with surprise and frustration. "Sara, I'm not talking about the past."

"Well I am. Did you ever sleep with her?"

"Sara..."

"Did you, Gil?" Her voice began to escalate as she was finally able to say what she had been wanting to ask for years. "Did you bend her over her desk and fuck her?"

"Sara..." His voice began to rise as well. This was not the conversation he was wanting.

"Did she scream your name in ecstasy?"

"Stop!" Grissom screamed at the top of his lungs.

Sara instantly hushed.

"Would you stop? I don't know what you want me to tell you, Sara. I've told you the truth; Heather and I have been friends for some time now. We rarely see each other, but we do trust one another."

"Yeah, well that deer in the headlights look you had at the hospital was classic 'new girlfriend meets the old girlfriend'. Just so you know, I didn't tell her about us."

Sara quickly opened her door and climbed out. Grissom was right on her heels. She opened their front door. "Hey Roscoe. Come on, let's go out side, I'm sure you've been a good boy."

Grissom followed Sara as she put the dog in the back yard. Once the door was secure he grabbed her arms to hold her in front of him.

"Kinda out of character for you, isn't it? I mean, isn't Heather the dominant one? Don't I get to beat you?"

"This is bull shit. Would you stop with your tirade and listen to me?"

"Fine."

Grissom sucked in a breath and held it. Once he was sure about what he was going to say, he released it. "I'm going to tell you everything, but I want you to remain silent until I'm done. Capieche?"

Sara nodded. He pulled her over to the couch and sat her down next to him.

"The first time I met Heather, was seven years ago. I was intrigued by her, by her way of life. She was this extravagant lock that I couldn't pick. That's when we became friends. She knew me before I had said anything, read me like an open book. The second time was in 2003. Remember I told you about my hearing?" She slowly nodded, not liking where this was going. "She figured that out too. But that time I saw her..." He paused, knowing Sara wouldn't like this. "I was needing more than a friend, and she was more than willing to help me with what ever I needed."

"I don't think I want to know." She tried to stand but his hand stopped her.

"I did have sex with Heather that night. That was before there was an 'us', yet in the heat of passion, I called out your name."

Sara froze. Even back then he had fantasies about her, but the fact he had to go to 'her' didn't sit well with her.

"I was thinking of you. Heather wasn't concerned, in fact, she explained it to me. I knew then that the feelings I had for you wouldn't go away. I then betrayed her trust the very next morning." Grissom stopped again, making sure Sara was still with him.

"Then last year, when her daughter was killed, it destroyed her. I watched as this free, powerful woman was dragged down to the cold depths of revenge. God knows, if it was me, I would have tried to kill him as well, but after that, we grew close again. And when you saw me earlier, I had just found her granddaughter. She only knew she was alive, but had never met her. Sara, she tried to kill herself. She's my friend and I needed to help her, I just couldn't stand around and watch her try to end her life."

Sara leaned back into the couch as she soaked all of this in.

"I love you Sara. Please understand and trust me when I say that we're just friends."

Grissom stopped there and waited for her reaction, hoping it was a good one. But he wasn't so sure after the silence extended for several minutes.

Finally, Sara turned to him. Her eyes had dried, but the redness remained. "Show me."

Confused only momentarily, Grissom moved in and pressed his lips to her cheek. He slowly made his way to her ear and used his tongue to toy with her ear lobe.

"I love you," he whispered, before trekking his mouth down to the sensitive place on her neck.

Sara tipped her head as he nibbled and sucked on her soft skin. She even released a slight moan as he proceeded back around to her chin. Grissom kissed her hard and full on the mouth, using his tongue to part her lips to taste her better. She never once resisted, as every move he made was the right one and her body was being slowly turned on like a row of light switches.

Before she knew it, Grissom had skillfully unbuttoned her blouse and was opening it. Sara remained silent, taking in the sensations as he moved back down her neck. The Tetons were his next stop. Grissom reached behind her back to unclasp her bra. She helped him as he removed both articles of clothing, then without warning he leaned in and sucked in a nipple.

"Ohhh..."

Sara was thinking that if she died at that moment, she would, indeed, die happy. Her hands went to the soft curls that made up Grissom's hair, and pulled him to her. He opened his mouth as wide as he could, taking as much of her in as he could before working his way back to the end, releasing the nipple with a 'pop'.

Unable to hold herself up any longer, Sara fell back on the couch. Grissom never missed a beat and moved with her. He nipped her skin as he moved to give her other breast the same attention. Like with her shirt, Grissom made quick work of the button and zipper on the jeans.

Sara's hands reached over his shoulders and pulled on his shirt. Grissom released his hold on her only to get his shirt off before his lips reattached to her skin. Her eyes closed tightly as she felt one of his hands caress her through her jeans. Grissom sat up and pulled her jeans off, leaving her in a skimpy pair of black panties. Sara reached up behind to brace herself on the armrest, as Grissom re-adjusted himself, cradling her hips in his hands.

A gentle blowing to the soaked fabric elicited a moan from her. Grissom then moved closer to run his tongue over the material, as several fingers worked the barrier between his lips and the scented garden that always intoxicated him. After her panties were finally removed, Grissom kissed down the inside of her thighs, and without warning, plunged his mouth to her.

"Ohhhh..., God!" Sara gasped as her grip on the couch intensified.

His talents never ceased to amaze her as he slipped two fingers into her and gently sucked her clit. She was close, and he knew it.

"Come on Sara." Grissom looked up to watch her expression briefly, before returning to the task at hand.

He watched her stomach tighten and her skin begin to flush. The moans increased as he worked his fingers more feverishly, encouraging her to orgasm.

"Grissssssooommmmm..." Sara lost her breath as her body contracted around his hand. She lost all conscious thought as the lightning crashed behind her closed eyelids.

Grissom slowed his hand as she came down off of her high. While she was still in a daze, he made quick work of his pants before gently stretching himself out over her. Sara instinctively reached up to grasp his shoulders as he placed several soft kissed around her face.

Sara opened her eyes, her voice forgotten until he moved, pressing himself to her opening. "Yessss."

It was all the permission he needed as he penetrated her. He slid into her, never stopping until he was completely engulfed by her heat.

"Oh God, Sara." Grissom spoke hoarsely into her neck as he slowly pulled back, before thrusting back into her as slow as his body would allow.

Her hands gripped his shoulders as the slow starting pace began to pick up. Incoherent moans fell from both of their lips, between kisses. Grissom tried to keep his pace controlled, even as Sara's grip was telling him more. He was succeeding, right up until the point where Sara moved her legs higher, pulling him into her as deep as he could go.

That was Grissom's undoing. He thrusted harder. Sara increased the grip on his shoulders as she felt her body tense once again. She used to fake orgasms with other men, but with Grissom, she had forgotten how, as he could bring her to the brink faster than she could think about faking.

Grissom buried his face into the crook of her neck as he did all he could to keep from coming before her. He didn't have to wait long, Sara's whole body tensed again. With one final deep thrust, Grissom was able to let him self go, spilling himself inside her.

It was all Sara could do to stay conscious as her high subsided. She gripped Grissom, not wanting him to separate from her. He understood, as movement was not possible. The only thing he could do was make sure she was comfortable as he pulled the blanket off the back of the couch to cover themselves up before falling into a peaceful slumber.

* * *

Peace. It was peaceful as they prepared for shift that evening. Little smiles and subtle touches became the comfort and reassurance each other needed. Not words.

They were sharing coffee in the kitchen when the doorbell rang. They both looked up at each other as Roscoe let out a small bark and headed to the front door.

"I'll see who it is." Sara said, as she followed the dog to the front room. She reached down and grabbed Roscoe's collar before opening the door.

It was the last person she'd expected to see. Both stood staring at each other for what seemed like a short time, but Grissom's voice broke the silence, indicating it was longer than a few seconds.

"Heather."

Sara stepped back, pulling the dog with her, as Grissom stepped forward.

"Come in."

Grissom risked a glance at Sara as Heather entered the residence. She kept her grasp on the dog as she let her eyes lock with his. Heather stopped and turned around.

"Ms. Sidle, it's good to see you again."

Not trusting her voice, Sara only smiled. The temptation to release the dog and say 'sic 'em' was tempting.

"How is your granddaughter?" Grissom interrupted.

"She's wonderful. The spitting image of Zoe. I never thanked you."

Grissom smiled and moved a step closer to Sara.

"You've been a great friend through all of this. Thank you."

"You're welcome, Heather."

She smiled back, not knowing what to say.

"Would you like some coffee?" Sara couldn't believe that the invitation had come from his mouth. She had wanted to hurt Grissom before; now she wanted to mutilate him.

"I wouldn't want to intrude."

"You're not." Grissom reached out and placed his hand on Sara's back, guiding her back to the kitchen. "I think he'll be alright now."

Sara released the dog and, surprisingly, Grissom leaned over to place a kiss on her cheek. He escorted her into the kitchen as Heather followed.

"You have a lovely home."

"Thank you." Sara and Grissom spoke in unison.

Grissom poured Heather a cup of coffee and sat down next to Sara. She sipped the hot liquid. "So, Gil, is this 'the' Sara you spoke of?"

"Hmm. She is." He reached over, taking up Sara's hand in his.

"I knew you would eventually pursue her. How long?"

"Just over a year."

"You're happy, I can tell. You don't carry the same weight on your shoulders you used to." She sipped her coffee again. "Do your co-workers know?"

Grissom shook his head and Sara averted her eyes. Heather saw this.

"Sara, don't be ashamed of this relationship." Grissom looked to Sara as she retained eye contact with Heather.

"I'm not."

"But you're afraid of the consequences. The 'what ifs', the looks. Gil's not. In fact, I'd bet you could care less about being discovered." Grissom remained unmoved by Heather's observations. The silence hung in the air for a brief time.

"I should go." Heather sat her cup down and stood. Grissom joined her and escorted her to the door. Sara never moved.

"Come here, Roscoe."

The dog was at her side in an instant and Sara gave a few good pats to his head. She could hear Grissom and Heather talking, but couldn't make out the words. She knew better, but just had to know what they were saying.

"She's special, isn't she?"

"Very."

"I'm glad you were able to overcome your fear."

He was taken aback. "What fear?"

"Your fear of being known."

Grissom just smiled. "If you need anything..."

"I'll be alright. You're a great man, and a great friend. Thank you for your help." Heather moved in and kissed him on the cheek. She stepped back and placed her hand where she had kissed him. "Tell Sara bye for me."

"I will." Grissom seemed unmoved by her gestures.

Watching another woman kiss Grissom, even if it was just a friendly peck on the cheek, the emotion was too much for Sara and she returned to the kitchen. She heard the door close and shortly after, Grissom stood behind her. He placed his hands on the sides of her arms and moved then softly up and down.

Sara sat motionless for a moment, but once she realized that she was the one woman he had always wanted to be with, her shoulders relaxed and her tension floated away under his touch. Grissom leaned over Sara, wrapping his arms around her, squeezing his love into her.

"Are you alright, honey?"

Sara sighed. "I don't know what to think. A big part of me hates her guts, but...she's your friend." Grissom remained silent as she continued. "So, I suppose I should just stop fretting so much over her. I mean, you're just friends, right?"

"Right."

She relaxed even more when he kissed her cheek.

"I love you Sara, and I will always be here for you, protecting you."

The quiet lingered between them as they prepared themselves for another night at work. Another night where anything could happen, anything.

* * *

See, the work of a mad woman. Thanks for reading, please oh pretty please leave revews. I love them. That means you to Kim.

TDCSI


	2. Chapter 2

Ok, so I couldn't help myself and had to add on to the first chapter. Especially after watching Living Doll. Man I was, and still am pissed. How dare they leave us good people hanging like that. Thanks to Kakidoll for the lightning fast beta, damn woman, do you have a life?

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Good or Bad Part II

It was more than enough to make his heart sink. Not that the new miniature was once again personally delivered, but the fact that the victim was Sara.

His Sara, and she was still alive, but for how long. Grissom grabbed his cell phone as he rushed from his office. She was heading home, but he was hoping by some stroke of luck, she was still in the building. It had only been twenty minutes since he last saw her, she said her goodbyes and with a sly smile, she headed for her car.

But now, now her life was in danger, and he knew there was nothing he could do to stop it.

"Come on Sara, pick up."

He continued on his mission as he headed to the reception desk. After a brief conversation with Judy, Grissom gathered the miniature and his team in the layout room.

It didn't take them long to have the identity of the killer in their hands. She had worked as a janitor for the past month, an inside job, who would have thought. Another shocker was the fact that she was a 'she', they had been looking for a man.

Nick and Warrick headed out with Sofia once the address had been confirmed. Catherine stood in front of Grissom's office as Greg ran a soil sample off the model to Hodges, hoping to get a search area. She watched as the normally cool, calm, and collected Gil Grissom turned into the exact opposite. His words were vague, but to the point.

He loved Sara, but for how long. She knew they always had this 'thing' between them, but thought she had figured Grissom for a chicken. Nick had brought it up earlier in the year, turns out he was right. Sara had been the woman in his life, and he looked better because of it. Now, a psychopath was about to take it all away.

It didn't take long and they had her. Brass thought it was a bad idea that Grissom interrogate her alone, especially after what Catherine had informed him of. Only she didn't know that he already knew. When he found Sara's abandoned car in the parking garage, his anger rose, but when her ringing cell phone caller ID displayed 'Grissom', he felt as if he had been stabbed in the heart.

Now Grissom was holding Natalie by her shoulders, shaking her violently as she sang, attempting to get the location of Sara out of her. He had to break it up.

"Gil."

"Where is she Natalie, where is Sara!?"

"Gil, come on." He grabbed his friend by the arm, and with the help of another officer, was able to pull him out of the door.

Brass was amazed that Grissom had kept his cool for so long as he talked to her. If it had been him, he would have just beaten it out of her. As they entered the hall, he felt Grissom get very heavy in his arms. With the help of the officer, Brass sat him down on the nearby bench and kneeled in front of him.

Before he could speak, that all too infuriating voice boomed down the hall. Brass knew he needed to run interference.

"Not now, Ecklie.

"I just wanted to tell Gil that I've called all available CSI's to help, and the Sheriff has called in any available officers. When you get an area to search, the birds are ready to fly, as long as it's just raining."

Brass let his voice calm, as he was surprised. "Thanks."

Just then Hodges came running around the corner. He was out of breath, but was able to get out his findings. "She's...she's south of the city."

Grissom caught his second wind and headed towards the layout room, Brass and a still talking Hodges followed. Catherine, Greg, Nick, and Warrick got there just as they did. Warrick rolled out a map of the area. It was like de-ja-vu, only Nick was present and Sara was the one trapped, fighting for her life, praying they would find her in time.

"GCMS found minute traces of gold dust in the soil."

"So she's got to be near a mine." Nick chimed in, as he circled the fifteen possible mines south of the city.

Grissom turned to Brass. "Get the choppers up and searching these locations. Next to those mountains, with this rain, she'll drown if we don't get to her soon." As Brass got on the phone, Grissom turned back to the group. "Two to a truck. Hodges, go with Greg; Cath, you're with me."

Nobody questioned Grissom's orders as they all rushed out. The three Denali's screamed to the desert that lay south of Las Vegas, their flashing lights were intensified by the rain as it began to come down harder. Several miles behind was a row of cop cars, heading to the same destination.

As the city lights faded, giving way to the enveloping darkness, three spotlights from the helicopters could be seen from a distance. Using two-way radios, Grissom split the team into three groups as they each headed to follow a chopper. Brass stuck with Grissom and Catherine.

The entire way she wanted to ask about his relationship with Sara, but decided to bring it up when they found Sara. If they found her, and if she was alive. If Grissom was this distraught now, what would he be like if he lost her.

After twenty minutes of searching the darkness, the helicopter began to flash it's spot light. "Look, Gil." Catherine pointed.

He looked over to where the chopper was hovering.

"I don't know if we can get there from here?" Catherine pondered out loud.

Grissom chewed on her question momentarily. "Where there's a will, there's a way." He punched the four-wheel drive button and waited until the light indicated the all wheel drive had been engaged. "Hold on."

Catherine reached over her head and grabbed the 'oh shit' handle as Grissom steered the Denali towards the awaiting helicopter. Brass and the two cruisers that were following stopped, there was no way their cars would make that.

Brass got on the radio indicating they had found something as he and the other officers proceeded by foot.

Grissom was a man on a mission and Catherine was hoping that he wouldn't kill them in the process. They had a few close calls, but as he steered the truck over the hill, they looked down upon the overturned Mustang. Grissom pointed the nose down and stuck his toe in the carpet; he couldn't get to Sara fast enough.

Once the vehicle skidded to a stop in the mud, Grissom jumped out and slid towards the single pale arm that stuck out from under the car like he was sliding into home plate.

"Sara!"

He grabbed her arm and quickly felt her wrist for a pulse while his eyes sought out her face. Catherine radioed back to everyone else that they had indeed, found her.

The other helicopters joined in, adding more light to the situation, as Grissom kept trying to see her. He practically climbed under the car with her.

"Sara, honey, I'm here. Come on, open your eyes for me please."

Unable to find a pulse on her wrist, Grissom stretched his arm to feel her neck as she continued to be unresponsive to his voice. Catherine was also down, looking in as well. Listening to Grissom talk the way he was to Sara was something she never thought she would hear.

"Sara, please, open your eyes. Please honey, wake up." Grissom pleaded as the rain intensified.

"Gil, the waters beginning to rise. We need to get her out now!" Catherine stood and turned to see about twenty officers, along with her fellow CSI's, top the hill that Grissom had carelessly driven over. "Over here!"

Grissom continued to plead for Sara to wake up as Catherine gathered the men. "We need to move this car or she'll drown."

No more words were needed as they all moved to the side of the car. Catherine stood back as Brass joined Grissom in the mud.

"I'll get her arm, can you reach her vest?"

"Yeah." Grissom stretched farther under the car clasping Sara's vest. "Got it."

"Okay, we're ready." Brass called out.

"On three." Catherine stood over Grissom ready to help. "One, two, three!"

Everyone grunted and strained, and the car began to move.

"Pull!" Grissom grunted, as he and Brass struggled to pull.

The grunting continued, but once Sara's body began to move, she slid out easily. Grissom and Brass pulled her several feet away from the car as the guys dropped it.

"Sara!" Grissom rolled her onto her back and lowered his ear to her mouth. Her entire face was covered in mud. "She's not breathing." He used his shirt sleeve to wipe her face off from a majority of the mud.

Brass felt for a pulse as Catherine and several others helped one of the helicopters safely land nearby. Grissom blew several breaths into her and looked up to Brass. With a slight shake of his head, he began chest compressions.

Catherine returned to watch with the others. The four CSI's and lab tech stood close and watched as Grissom fought to save the life of one of their own.

"Come on Sara, breathe." He blew more air into her.

They worked in unison for several minutes. Brass shot Catherine a look of despair between compressions. She moved over and kneeled next to Grissom.

"Gil..."

"NO! I'm not giving up on her dammit!" He gave her another breath. "Come on honey."

"She's gone." Catherine placed a hand on his back as the tears rolled down her already wet cheeks.

Grissom ignored her and forced more air into Sara's lungs as Brass sat back on his heels, he was crying now as well.

"Sara, please." Grissom begged, and with a final push of air, Sara coughed. "Sara!"

She continued to cough as Grissom rolled her onto her side, aspirating water from her lungs.

"There you go, cough it up." He patted her back to help her before rolling her back into him.

"Get her to the chopper, he'll take you to the hospital." Catherine pointed to the awaiting helicopter as Grissom scooped her up.

Nick and Warrick helped him get her in as Catherine climbed in with Grissom. Sara laid on floor of the helicopter as Grissom cradled her in his lap.

"Let's go!" Catherine called out to the pilot, motioning their readiness.

The helicopter rose above the earth and was pointed toward Desert Palms Hospital. For her own account, Catherine reached down placing two fingers to Sara's neck. Grissom watched her intently.

"It's weak, but it's there. Let's hope she can hang on until we get there."

Grissom read the concern in her eyes, only to have his reflect the same worry. He looked back to Sara, his hand stroking the wet and muddy hair he had become accustomed to smelling as he slept. The thought of that never happening again made the pain in his chest worse.

* * *

FYI, I have more in the works on this one. I had to split it up otherwise it would be insanely long. Part three should be up as soon as I get it written.

So be wonderful little readers and review, pretty please with sugar on top.

TDCSI


	3. Chapter 3

Thank you so much for all of the awesome reviews, and if I was to miraculously get a job writing this at CBS, well lets just say that no one would be disappointed, and Jorja Fox would have signed her contract months ago. Otherwise, I'm dragging her ass back to the farm, and see can watch us butcher a pig, then I'd make her eat it. I know, I'm evil.

Thanks Kakidoll for the fast beta work, hurry up and get part four done will ya, these good people need closure.

* * *

Good or Bad III

The helicopter landed just in time. Catherine jumped out as the trauma team moved in.

"She's not breathing!" She yelled over the loud whirring of the blades.

They pulled Sara out and onto the stretcher. Grissom and Catherine followed closely through the maze of hospital halls until they were finally stopped at a room they couldn't follow into. Grissom fought to look through the windows as he felt his life slip away.

Several bodies moved around Sara in organized chaos, hooking up monitors, sticking her with various needles, and listening to directions being barked out by the attending. The only monitor he payed any attention to was the unsteady beep that was emitted from the heart monitor. Catherine heard it as well. and stood next to her friends' side.

"She's in v-fib."

"Paddles."

The voices within the room seemed calm to Grissom, if it were him, he would be panicking. Who was he fooling; he was panicking. Sara was lying lifeless before his eyes and there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.

"Charging...clear!"

Sara's body lurched as the electricity attempted to restart her heart. Catherine unconsciously grasped Grissom, as she watched on as well. She risked a look into his eyes, the hope that was there was fading with each attempt the trauma team made to restart Sara's heart.

Just when they thought all was lost, "Got her." Sara's heart began to beat once again. "Intubate her and get a chest x-ray."

Hope filled Grissom's eyes once again as Sara's heart beat grew stronger by the minute. He continued to watch, as Catherine stood supportive at his side. To him, the minutes seemed to drag on as if they passed as hours. He never broke eye contact with Sara until the doctor approached them on her condition.

"I'm Dr. Winters. We have her stabilized and are prepping her for surgery. I'm afraid there is some internal bleeding. What exactly happened?"

Catherine looked to Grissom; he was unresponsive, so she answered for him. "She was abducted and placed in the desert under a wrecked car. The rain coming of the mountains flooded under it. We revived her at the scene but..." continuing was too hard and her voice caught. The look on Grissom's face when Sara stopped breathing in the helicopter, was too much.

"I understand. I'm not sure how long the operation will last, so if you need to go home and get cleaned up, please do. I'll look for you when she gets out."

"Thank you, doctor." Catherine knew he was talking about the mud that caked their clothes, and he was right. She also knew it was going to take an act of congress to get Grissom out of this hospital. Plan two. "Come on Gil, let's go to the waiting room on the surgical floor and wait." She tugged his arm and could feel him reluctantly follow.

They sat in about as comfortable as silence could get, at least until the guys showed up. Well, Nick and Warrick. They had both changed out of their mud soaked clothes.

"Hey Cath. How's Sara?" Warrick sat down beside her.

"She's in surgery at the moment." She watched as Nick sat down. "Gil, do you have your house keys?"

Grissom sat unmoving, staring at the landscape painting across the room. She placed a hand on his leg, and he jumped under her touch.

"Sorry, what?"

"I asked if you had your house keys?"

"Umm..." He pressed his hands to the outside of each pocket searching for that familiar bulge. "I guess they are on the key ring to the Denali." His voice was low and wounded.

Nick pulled out a set of keys. "These them?"

Grissom looked up and recognized the key chain of the scorpion Sara had gotten for him. With a nod, Nick tossed him the keys. He located the key to the house and handed it Catherine.

She took it from him and glanced at Nick before looking back to Grissom. "I'm going to go get cleaned up. I'll pick you up a change of clothes and bring them back."

"Let the dog out."

"Huh?"

"The dog, his name is Roscoe. He's Sara's."

Catherine didn't bother to ask any more. She stood, pulling Warrick with her. 'Keep an eye on him,' she mouthed to Nick. He nodded and watched them leave before he trained his eyes back to his broken supervisor.

Once Catharine had showered and changed, she and Warrick approached the door to Grissom's house. "So, how long do you think this has been going on?"

"Cath, I don't think this is the appropriate time to be quizzing him on a relationship that he could loose." She turned back to the door.

"I guess you're right." Catherine opened the door and walked in with Warrick.

"Roscoe, here boy." He looked around, flipping on a light in the entryway. "Roscoe." They continued to move through the house.

"She's been here a good while, there is hardly nothing the same about this place." Catherine looked to the bedroom door, the inner sanctuary. "Why don't you look for the dog and I'll get him some clothes?"

Warrick silently agreed and they split up. Catherine pushed open the door and couldn't help but look at every little last detail of the bedroom. The large bed dawned brown covers, a TV was hung on the wall at the foot of the bed, two nightstands had their own lamps and a book ready for their readers to return. Grissom had very dark shades over the large single window to block out the intruding sun, or prying eyes.

Catherine shook off that last thought and searched for a duffle bag. Once she had several changes of clothes packed, Warrick joined her.

"I can't find him."

She sighed. "Did you check outside?"

Warrick nodded, "Nothing."

"Well, lets get back, one of us can come by later. I'm sure he's thinking 'strangers in the house' and he's hiding."

He placed a hand on her back as they walked back to the front door. "What kind of dog do you suppose Sara has?"

Catherine shrugged her shoulders. "Probably some little fuzzy lap dog that's worthless, other than to cuddle with."

They froze dead in their tracks. "Something tells me Sara's not the wussy dog kinda girl."

The growling that appeared behind them continued. Very slowly Warrick turned around, keeping himself in front of Catherine. As suspected, there stood Roscoe, the short hair on his back stood in a line from his shoulder blades to the middle of his back. His tail was low and motionless as he stared at the intruders intently with black eyes.

"Hey, Roscoe." Warrick was hoping the dog would recognize his name.

The only thing that happened was the large boxer took a step towards them and refreshed his growl.

"Let me try." Catherine dropped the duffle bag and moved around Warrick. "Hey buddy." She lowered herself to the dogs level. "Come here Roscoe, it's okay, we won't hurt you." The low, soothing, feminine voice had slightly calmed the dog, so she continued. "Here boy, I'm sure you need to go outside and potty, and I'm sure you're hungry, huh?"

After some more convincing words, the dog made his way to sniff Catherine's hand, and with a few gentle pets, he let his guard down and licked her hand and face, happy once again. Warrick took him outside to do his business while Catherine filled his food and water bowls. They looked at him one more time. His face was sad, as if he suspected something was wrong.

"We'll be back, boy." Warrick gave the dog a last bit of reassurance before leaving with Catherine.

They walked hand in hand back to the surgical waiting room. Nick was lying on his back in one of the hard couches; the steady rising and falling of his chest indicated he was asleep. Grissom hadn't moved since they left. Catherine released Warrick to kneel in front of him.

"Gil..." She searched out his eyes; the dry tears highlighted the redness that refused to leave. "...I brought you some clothes. The nurse told us she was still in surgery. Come on, you need to get cleaned up." Catherine stood pulling him with her.

His body creaked slightly from sitting in the same position for so long as he stood. She looked to Warrick as he handed her the duffle bag before dragging a broken Grissom to the showers.

She sat on the bench in the middle of the empty locker room as the sound of running water filled the silence. Grissom was about as low as she had ever seen him. If Sara didn't make it, she knew he would die right along with her.

"Cath."

With a shake of her head, she looked up. Grissom was wet, clad in only a white cotton towel. Damn, he looked good.

"Uh...yeah."

"My bag." he pointed to the duffle bag between her legs.

"Sorry." She pulled it up and handed it to him.

Grissom took it and retreated behind the row of lockers. "Go ahead."

"Go ahead what?"

"I know you have been dying to ask about me and Sara since I confessed my love for her in the lab."

She smiled; he could read her just like she could read him. "I'm happy for you two, I really am. I was just curious as to how long this has been going on."

Grissom smiled as he returned from behind the lockers, shirtless, wearing jeans and socks. "Over a year."

Catherine's eyes grew bigger. "Kudos to you two, I had no idea. I honestly thought you were doing Heather again."

He stopped digging through his bag to glare at her. "She's just a friend, please, drop it."

"Sorry."

They remained silent as Grissom finished dressing. Feeling revived, Grissom returned to the waiting room with Catherine in tow. Brass and Greg had joined Warrick and Nick, who was now awake.

"Anything?" Grissom asked, as his absence was longer than he had intended, twenty minutes.

Several shaking heads was his only response. With a heavy sigh he sat down, once again letting the silence drown them in their own flood of worry and concern.

* * *

Once I get part four back, it will be up as well. See, I told you if I tried to cram all of this into one chapter, ya'll would still be reading.

The reviews have all kicked ass, please keep 'em coming.

TDCSI


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks for all of the great reviews, I'm thinking I'll put in a resume at CBS. The whole horse and dog trainer thing might be a turn off to them. Oh well, one can dream, right? Thanks to Kakidoll for the fast beta work once again.

* * *

Good or Bad IV

Another hour passed, and Grissom stood at a large window that overlooked the shining lights of Vegas. He checked his watch by habit, forgetting, each time, that it had stopped. The mud and water from the desert had finally done it in, as it read one sixteen in the morning, the time he found her. Now it was nearly five; soon the sun would rise and spread it's warmth back to the desert oasis.

Greg, Warrick, and Nick were playing cards; it was something they had to do to keep their minds off of Sara. It's not as if they didn't care, it was just how they dealt with it. Brass was doing a sudoku, Grissom had tried to get him to do crosswords, but after several attempts, let the number puzzle hook him like it had Hodges. Catherine was reading every magazine the place had to offer, all while he stood poised, looking out the window. It was how they all dealt with their concern.

The door to the waiting room swung open, Grissom turned, as everyone lifted his or her heads to see a nurse escorting a frail elderly man to the couch where Catherine sat. He smiled and nodded to the group he had imposed on, as the nurse left him.

"Hello." His voice stuttered slightly.

Everyone but Grissom responded with some sort of greeting. The old man looked at the company he had, all but one was carrying a gun, and some sort of ID.

"Are you cops?"

Only Brass and Catherine responded with a nod.

"Is a friend of your hurt?"

Grissom moved, uneasy, Catherine saw this and knew the old man was just trying to make conversation to lighten the dark mood they all held.

"Yeah. She's tough though."

The man nodded. "I'm Harvey. My wife Edna had a stroke."

"I'm sorry." Catherine set her magazine down. "How long have you two been married?"

Harvey sighed, "It will be fifty two years this July."

Everyone but Grissom was now looking at the old man; he was envious of him now. This was the man he had wanted to be. To live the rest of his life with Sara, but he didn't want to out-live her. There was no way he could go on living if she died first. He would die right along side her.

"Wow, congratulations." Brass chimed in.

"Thank you. Edna, she's tough, we've been though a lot together." Tears began to form in his eyes.

The door opened once again, only this time it revealed a man standing in green scrubs. Grissom turned, hoping that this was the man that was finally going to give him news about the love of his life. The doctor looked over the crowd, his eyes finally settling on Harvey.

"Mr. Tanner..." The doctors' voice was low, and attempted to be soothing. They all knew what he was about to say, as they themselves had said it many times in the past. "...I'm sorry. We did everything we could."

They all watched as the older gentleman was reduced to nothing in mere seconds, as his sorrow finally broke through. The nurse returned to help him out of the room. Just as the door closed, it opened again.

It only took Grissom several strides to cross the room to stand in front of Dr. Winters. Everyone stood up and proceeded to stand behind Grissom, as he pleaded with his eyes.

"Sara's out of surgery, she's in the ICU. We were able to stop the bleeding but in the process, she lost a lot of blood. She's getting a transfusion now." He paused, any time a doctor pauses in the middle of giving news on the condition of a patient it was far from good. "I don't know if you knew, or even if Sara knew, but she was pregnant."

Shock filled all of their faces.

"I'm guessing maybe a few weeks."

Grissom closed his eyes and shook his head, as if he didn't accept this information. "You said was..."

Dr. Winters nodded, "The bleeding was too severe, and there was trauma to her uterus, her body went into survival mode and expelled the embryo."

"But she's okay, right?" Catherine butted in.

"For right now, she holding her own. If she starts bleeding again, I'm not so sure we would be able to stop it."

"I want to see her."

"Maybe in a few..."

"I want to see her. Now." Grissom's voice was stern, his face like steel. This wasn't a request, it was an order.

"I'm sorry, only doctors are allowed in the ICU."

The corner of Grissom's mouth rose up, "And I just happen to be one."

* * *

The elevator stopped and the two doctors exited.

"You know I could get fired for this?"

Grissom didn't answer as he walked beside Dr. Winters. He was led to a room where several people lay connected to various machines, but his eyes only found one.

"Thank you."

As he approached her bedside, he could see she was not out of the woods yet. Her skin was extremely pale, but clean. She was free from the mud that had coated her hair and skin the last time he saw her. The only color in the area was the red blood that was being pushed into a vein. Grissom took her hand into his; the coolness of it startled him.

"Sara, I'm here, I'm here honey." He whispered to her. "Please Sara, you have to fight. You never give up, and I'm not giving up on you." A lone tear rolled down his cheek. "We got her, I'm sorry it was too late, but I did catch her."

He continued to caress her hand and whisper words of encouragement for as long as he could, but Grissom was soon discovered and asked to leave. When he refused, the nurse threatened to have him escorted from the hospital. It was tempting for him to refuse again, just to see if she actually would, but he decided to leave on his own accord. Before releasing her hand, Grissom placed a kiss to Sara's forehead. "I'll be back soon honey, you stay strong. I love you."

The nurse followed him to the double doors to ensure he indeed left. Waiting on the other side were the remaining members of his team. Grissom tried to remain strong; he was always the one they were able to lean on. Catherine approached him and wrapped her arms around him.

"It's okay."

He finally lost his emotional battle and broke down in Catherine's arms. The rest of the guys choked back their own tears, knowing the outcome was not going to be good.

They all returned to the waiting room on that floor. Grissom lay down on the couch as the others settled in. Catherine watched with great concern as her best friend closed his eyes and drifted off into a restless sleep. The boys eventually left, but she remained at his side. Whether he knew it or not, he needed her to be there. She watched him fight, what he was fighting was obvious, but Catherine teetered on which option was better; let him sleep and fight, at least he would get some rest, or be awake and fight, constantly draining what little energy he had.

Then she felt it. It was that bad vibe you get when you know something is wrong, or someone is watching you. Slowly and carefully, she turned around to see the dark figure standing at the door.

"I don't think you should be here." Catherine had intended to whisper, but failed miserably.

"He helped me in my time of need, now I want to return the favor."

Just as she was about to respond, Catharine felt him move beneath her hands as he sat up.

"Heather." Grissom paused to collect himself. "What are you doing here?"

"I was coming to get my insulin when I saw several of your guys leaving with tears in their eyes. The nurse said there wasn't anyone admitted by your name, then I remembered Sara." Heather moved passed the unapproving Catherine to sit next to him. "Is she alright?"

Grissom sucked in a breath and unconsciously held it. Heather reached over and took his hand in hers.

Catherine refused to stick around. "I'm going to head home, call me when you find something out, or you need anything. Don't worry about Roscoe."

He looked up to her as she stood. "Thanks, Cath."

She smiled and walked out.

"Grissom, is Sara going to be alright?"

"I don't know."

Heather squeezed his hand, "Sara's very strong. I'm sure she'll pull through." She searched his face; what ever had caused this, she could tell he felt somewhat responsible. "You know it's not your fault."

"I should have caught her sooner." He stared at the floor as he began to blame himself. "This whole time I thought the killer was a man, then when it turned out to be a woman...I never put two and two together until after she abducted Sara."

"No one could have predicted this, not even you."

"But I could have!" The tendons in his neck stood out as he practically condemned himself.

"Stop!" His head turned to meet her dark eyes. "Stop blaming yourself."

Just as he was about to retort, a nurse interrupted. "Dr. Grissom, Miss Sidle's awake and asking for you."

As if he'd been shot in the ass, Grissom jumped up and moved ahead of the nurse. He was at Sara's side with in a matter of seconds.

"Sara, honey." Once again he picked up her hand.

She opened her eyes slightly, just enough to see him. "Gil."

"Shhh, it's alright, don't try to speak, save your strength."

Sara saw the shadowy figure behind him. "S'okay...I love you." She sucked in a struggled breath.

"Sara, no. Sara!"

Her monitors began to chime and the ICU staff was at her side in an instant.

"Blood pressure is falling..."

Grissom stepped back, watching on in horror, once again, as Sara slipped away from him. Heather grabbed his hand and did something he never pictured her doing, she began to pray, and for the first time in a long time, he prayed right along side her.

His eyes remained closed; his ears wide open, absorbing the sounds of the commotion around Sara and the prayer falling from Heathers lips. Then the sound of hope filled the air as Sara's monitors began to settle back into a steady rhythm.

Relief flooded him once again as the nurses and doctor one by one left her side.

Dr. Winters approached him. "I'm afraid she's begun to bleed internally again. You are listed as her only contact."

"What are you saying, Doctor?"

"There are two options; one, we operate again to try to stop the bleeding. The risks are enormous. She could die on the table."

"Option two?"

"We do nothing but keep her comfortable, you'll get a chance to say goodbye."

"So either way, she'll die! What kind of scenario is that?"

"I'm sorry. That's all I can offer you. What do you want us to do?"

Grissom looked over the man's shoulders to look at Sara. She was pale but still fighting for every last breath. He moved past and stood next to her.

"How much time does she have if you do nothing?"

"A few hours give or take."

Grissom leaned over to Sara's face and whispered, "I'll never give up." With a kiss to her cheek, Grissom stood back up and turned to face the doctor. "She fights, I fight. Do the operation."

With a nod, Dr. Winters rushed out to gather his team.

"You just signed her death warrant."

Grissom narrowed his eyes at Heather. "No, by doing nothing I would have signed her death warrant. This way, she has the option, not me. Sara's strong, don't underestimate her." His tone was defensive and Heather knew she had worn out her welcome.

"I hope she pulls through."

He watched as she left, avoiding the team of doctors coming in to take away Sara.

* * *

Okay, there is one more chapter to come after this. Or so I'm thinking.

Keep the reviews coming, they are all good.

TDCSI


	5. Chapter 5

So, this is it, the last one. A little excitement in the beginning just for the spoon, she needed it. Thanks for the many reviews, they were all great. Thanks a bunch to Kakidoll for the fast beta work. Hope you're not mad at me for ending it.

* * *

Good or Bad V

Grissom fought and fought, but it seemed the harder he fought, the more he lost the battle with sleep. He teetered between reality and the dream world briefly before falling fully into the abyss.

He found himself standing in the darkness of his home; the only light source was the soft glow coming from direction of the bedroom. His brain told him it wasn't real, but his body drifted towards the light. Grissom paused at the threshold, willing his brain to stop telling him to stop. Then he caught sight of her.

He would recognize those legs anywhere, bare and long, calling him forth. Grissom stepped in, moving to the side of the bed. Sara was laying on her back, positioned like she was being crucified, hair fanned out over the pillows, wearing nothing but red panties and bra. The sigh emitted from him brought a smile to her face. He sat down on the bed next to her, running his hand from her collarbone, past her breasts, over her stomach. Grissom let his hand linger over her stomach briefly before continuing its journey. Reaching the apex of her thighs caused Sara to moan in pleasure.

Grissom smiled and moved to let his fingers slide along the lace until they were covered with her wetness. She parted her legs as he pushed two fingers into the scorching heat of her sex.

"Yesssss."

Using his free hand, Grissom pulled down the red lace of her bra and leaned over to suck in one of her pert nipples. Sara bucked under him, her arms remaining out to the sides, displayed as his personal buffet.

"Enough, want you."

How it happened he'll never know, but at the time he could care less. He was naked, poised between Sara's thighs, pushing he head of his cock into her. Forgetting this was a dream, he moved deep within her, trying to get to every man's goal; orgasm.

"Harder." She bucked against him.

Grissom grunted as he picked up the pace, needing the release he so greatly desired.

"Come on, harder."

He raised himself up on his arms to look down at her face. Sara's eyes remained closed as he thrusted harder and harder into her. Normally he would have come two times over at this pace, only now he couldn't. No matter how hard he tried, it just wasn't happening. It was pure torture.

Then it happened. "Stop."

At first he thought it was a figment of his imagination.

"Stop, Gil."

His breathing was labored as he stopped and Sara opened her eyes. They were coal black, emotionless, lifeless.

"Time to say goodbye."

"What?" He huffed, out of breath and hard as a rock, buried deep inside her.

"What are you talking about?"

Then her body suddenly grew cold, ice cold. Grissom jumped off of her, as the cold stung his body. It was then he realized what she was talking about.

"No, no Sara, you can't go. Please, don't leave me."

Her body reduced to a pile of dark ashes and the lights went out. He was standing in the darkness once again.

"Grissom."

"Sara, where are you?" He tried to move, but suddenly his legs refused to work.

"Grissom."

"Sara, Sara!"

"Grissom!"

His body shook with such force that it was forced to separate the dream from reality.

"Grissom, wake up." Catherine shook him until his eyes opened.

"Huh? Cath?" He began to sit up. "Sara! Where is she?"

"It's okay. The doctor was just here. She's in recovery, she made it through."

He gave his head a quick shake, "I don't understand, she was saying goodbye."

She sat beside him. "It was a dream, Gil. Sara's doing fine." But as always curiosity killed the cat. "Where's Heather?"

Grissom turned his head to glare at her. "I told her off."

"Oh."

The sudden silence was almost as much torture as the lack of ejaculation in his dream. He looked down; there was no hiding that. Grissom looked back up, clearing his voice. "Why are you here?"

"It's been nearly five hours since I left, and I haven't heard a thing. I was concerned about Sara, and you." She noticed he was trying to hide what she had already seen. "Need to take care of that?"

He turned red as he looked at her. "I'm fine."

Catherine smiled, "That must have been some dream."

"Can we change the subject, please?"

"Sure. I stopped by your place; let the dog out, put your mail in on the table, watered the plants. You know, the usual."

"Thank you."

She patted his leg. "I'm your friend, Gil, you would do the same for me."

He gave her a weak smile. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"Not telling you about things. You have always been the person I could talk to..."

"Now that someone is Sara."

"Still, I should have trusted you enough to tell you about us, but I just wasn't ready to have my personal life put under a microscope."

Catherine stood. "It's okay, I understand." She reached down and grabbed his hand. "Come on, I'll buy you a cup of coffee."

Grissom stood and followed her down to the hospital cafeteria. They sat and talked about anything except work, which was the last thing they needed to be reminded of. Before he knew it, several hours had passed.

"I need to get back to the lab."

"I guess I won't be in tonight." Grissom looked into his empty cup.

"Don't worry, I'm prepared to deal with Ecklie and the others. Just make sure Sara recovers."

He walked her to the front doors of the hospital before returning to check on Sara. The elevator doors opened just in time as he saw Sara being taken onto another lift.

"Dr. Winters." Grissom rushed to her side. "How is she?"

"She's doing exceptionally well, we're moving her to a private room." The door closed and the elevator began to move. "It seems you made the right call."

Grissom picked up her hand and ran his thumb over her knuckles. "She's a fighter."

"Indeed she is."

He watched silently as the nurses moved Sara into her new room, making sure everything was hooked up and working properly. Once they were satisfied, the nurses left him alone.

Grissom pulled a chair next to her bed and sat down, taking up her hand. He was content to just watch her rest. She was peaceful, in no pain, and that's the way he liked to see her.

He sat unmoving for hours, just holding her hand and watching her sleep. Every half hour, a nurse would enter to check on her, and make remarks on her chart. His eyes never averted from Sara's face, as they would come and go.

As he sat, the battle for sleep once again formed over him. Grissom would fight to keep his eyes opened and trained on her, but every now and then, they would shut, only to have him force them open. His fight didn't last long, and he was soon asleep once again.

This time he didn't dream. He couldn't recall the time when he had drifted off, but when his eyes opened, they connected with the chocolate eyes he had thought he might never see again.

"Hey, your awake." Grissom winced as he tried to sit up.

Sara gave him a weak smile as his hand moved a stray lock of hair from her face.

"Are you in any pain?"

"No." Her voice scratched as she attempted to speak.

"Hold on, I'll get you some water."

Sara watched on as he disappeared into the small bathroom, then returned with a cup of water.

"Here."

Grissom held the cup with one hand as the other helped her raise her head just enough to prevent chocking as she drank.

"Thanks." Her voice was clearer this time.

He sat back down, thinking of what to say to her. "I'm sorry."

Sara gave a slight shake of her head. "Not your fault."

"If I would have got her sooner..."

"Gil, I'll be fine."

He sighed, "But you were hurt, I was supposed to protect you."

"Stop blaming yourself." She placed a hand over her stomach.

Grissom saw this and moved his to cover hers. It was then Sara realized he knew what she had just learned before all of this took place. She looked up and caught his eyes. That bright ocean blue always made her melt.

"Do you know?"

He knew what she was asking, but didn't know how to tell her that it was no longer there. So he just nodded.

"I just found out before she took me."

"It's okay."

She should have known he would understand, and told him right away. "What do you think?"

He sighed, now he needed to tell her. "Honey..." He got that look on his face that he reserved for those uneasy conversations, where he didn't know how to proceed.

A tear rolled down her cheek, as she knew what he was about to tell her.

"You were injured very badly, and lost a lot of blood."

"It's okay." Why she was so upset was beyond her, maybe it was the fact that she was going to have a baby. His baby. The man of her dreams.

"Honey, don't cry." Grissom reached up and wiped the tears from her cheek. "We'll try again." The sincerity in his voice raised her hopes.

She could only smile as the machine next to her blinked; it didn't take long before Sara was fighting to keep her eyes open. Grissom saw her trying to fight the morphine.

"It's okay honey, just sleep. I'll be right here."

Sara remembered his words and the feel of his lips gently pressing to hers as she slipped into her subconscious.

FIN

* * *

Okay, that's it, for now. Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I did writing it. After last week I was just needing to make amends with myself so I could feel better until Sept. Four fucking months, I'm going to go insane.

TDCSI


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